WEEK 12 - STEP 10
[Note to reader: at a point in this you will hold up the chart showing how we take
inventory in columns, so have this ready before the start of the talk.]
So far, we have talked about some useful suggestions for when we first come in. We
have put these on posters that are pinned to the board behind me. Then we talked
about what the Big Book means by powerlessness over alcohol. That is, that sooner or
later we will make the insane act of taking that first drink and that will set off the
physical craving. We will take that first drink no matter what our situation, frame of
mind, mood or the level of knowledge of our illness and the workings of our minds.
We are beyond human help. The only thing that can help us is a Power greater than
ourselves. We have also talked about how some of us came to believe that a Power
greater than us could restore us to sanity. That is, would intervene and stop us from
making that insane act of taking the first drink. And how, in taking Step Three, we
handed our wills and our lives over to that Power by doing the programme and living
our lives according to spiritual principles. We have described the daily actions
(printed on cards that are available free) that we can take at this point to stay sober
and have stressed how important sponsors have been for us. A sponsor is someone
who has experience of going through the steps and can pass on that experience. After
Step Three, Steps Four to Nine �clear away the wreckage of the past�. We must get
rid of all the bad feelings we have had as a result of our past, because they will stop
the Higher Power from helping us even if we have asked Him. As the book says,
�harbouring such feelings cuts out the sunlight of the Spirit, the insanity of alcohol
returns and we drink again. And with us to drink is to die�.
The final three steps are often called the �maintenance steps�. These are the steps that
keep us sober once we have done the first nine and dealt with the past. They stop any
more wreckage building up. This week we are considering one of these, Step 10:
Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
Reading: pages 84-85. We continue to take inventory (as in Step Four) and continue to make
amends if we harm anyone (as in Steps Eight and Nine). We began our daily Step-10
inventory when we started our Step Four inventory, as it says on page 84:
�We vigorously
commenced this way of living as we cleaned up the past.�
Taking this to heart, we do daily
written inventory at the end of the day. We do it in columns just as we learnt to do in Step 4
[Hold up the large display of Step 4 inventory] Even better, if we can, we do the �spot
check� inventory where we write down resentments when they occur to save them persisting.
To emphasise the point that we must keep doing this the book says, again on page 84: �This is
not an overnight matter. It should continue
for a lifetime.�{p84}. [Take the visual down and
offer it to be passed around]
If we are unsure as to the action �We discuss them with someone immediately and we
make amends quickly if we have harmed someone.� This statement emphasises the need for
continued sponsorship.
One thing to watch for: occasionally, people feel that they now ought to be so
�spiritual� that they shouldn�t get resentments. This leads to a reluctance to acknowledge
them and as a consequence they stop doing daily Step 10s. To avoid this, it is important to
stress that we do not have a choice over whether or not we get resentments. We will get them.
We can�t help the thoughts that come into our heads so we can take neither the credit nor the
blame for the good or bad nature of those thoughts. However, once we have resentments, we
can choose � keep them and suffer, or take inventory and be free of them. We also have a
choice in the actions we take as a response to those thoughts. I have heard some refer to this
in meetings by saying that they are not responsible for the first thought that comes into their
heads, but they are responsible for the second and the third and the fourth and so on. So it is
clear, we must keep doing Step 10s. �It is easy to rest on our laurels. We are headed for
trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we have is
a daily reprieve contingent upon maintenance of our spiritual condition.�
{p85}.
Once we are through Step Five, there is usually nothing to be gained from reading out
the written Step 10s to our sponsors. If we feel that resentments won�t go, even if we do
inventory, then it is often because we are still not accepting that we are responsible for how
we feel, due to our defects of character. We want to blame the other person. We can help by
praying for honesty. Also, doing inventory with the Affects-My column, as described in Step
Four, may help as it will act as a �stepping stone� that will turn our attention fully to the real
cause of our problems � defects of character. Anything that is particularly embarrassing or
humiliating is a common exception to the former rule and should be referred to a sponsor.
The same may be true for any vexing and repeated patterns of bad behaviour.
The other point that should be made in connection with the effectiveness of Step 10 is
that it is not the only step that we do. We have to work through the first nine steps thoroughly
as the foundation. Even once we are through the first nine steps, we have to work Step 11 and
Step 12 as well as Step 10. None of these works in isolation, each is dependent upon the
practice of the others for their effectiveness.
PRAYERS FOR STEP 10
The prayers used in Step 4 are repeated here. So first of all, resentments against people:
�Please God help me to show this person the same tolerance, pity and patience that I
would cheerfully grant a sick friend.�{p63}
Prayer for fears:
�Please God remove my fear and direct my attention to what You would have me be.�{p68}
Step 10 prayer if we have done something wrong (recommended in the description of nightly
inventory):
�God please forgive me and show me what corrective measures I should take.�{p86}
That is the end of the talk. Now I am delighted to hand over to [Name] who will
disclose in a general way, what it was like, what happened, and what it is like
now.